Home Office

Scene: Yuppie Bar in DC

YUPPIE #1: Hey Tadd! Long time no see. How's it going chum?

YUPPIE #2 (Tadd): Biff! Great to see you old chap, I'm doing swimmingly. Thanks for asking chap. How's work, and hows Cecilia?

Biff: Cecilia's great thanks, she's in Gstad with Mumsy, decompressing. Its been a hard fall, what with the fluctuating market and all. Been working quite hard actually.

TADD: Working hard or hardly working!?

(Entire bar laughs uproariously)
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You may be asking yourself what the point of that little scene was. Well, I'll tell you...

Work.

We all do it, and most of us hate it. Whether it be a job we are overqualified for, a job that does not challenge us, or pointless mind-numbing boredom. There is no doubt about it. Work just basically sucks.

Yes, work sucks. A no brainer right?

However, I recently have been experiencing a combination of work and laziness that is so amazing and so glorious, that I had to put it down in blog form.

You question putting these two seeming contradictory terms together. You equate them with oxymorons like jumbo shrimp or Carlos Mencia, comedian. Well let me tell you something: Even though they may seem to be polar opposites they have been unified in my life.

Yes, I am talking about working from home.

Working from home is what I do now. It allows me to explore the finer things in life, like how long I can wear a sweatsuit without washing it.

Don't get me wrong, working from home sometimes actually encompasses doing work. Thats why I have email and a cell phone. On the flip side of it, however, I can squeeze leisure activities inbetween work tasks.

For example, naps. I can take a nap anytime I want to. I can get up at 9:01 a.m. As long as I am 'online' its all good.

There is a drawback to all of this. Namely, I don't know what to do with myself half the time. I mean you can only watch so much redtube.com and you can only eat so many Chipotles.

In other words, I am the ideal of "Office Space" personified. But I realized that without purpose and direction, daily life is simply a haze of hot sauce, flop sweat and Golden Girls reruns.

Therefore, I humbly solicit suggestions from you, my reader(s). What the hell should I do with my time?

(and don't you dare say look for a new job)